All posts filed under: non-fiction

The Ax You Carry

Early summer in Texas. I travel the winding pathways of this ripening year: through fallen petals, overgrown archways and green grass fields browning under a relentless sun, through leaves on trees that seem to open and fall between one heartbeat and the next. I have hung up my winter hat, cloaked in leathered skin, knees snagged by brambles, boots caked in mud, my steps embarrassingly unsteady, moving slowly through the quiet landscape of an anxious albeit healing mind. It is not a paved trail. The pathway narrows and rises, dips back, veers forward, then back again. My destination lies somewhere ahead: I can smell the fire of a welcoming hearth, feel the pleasing breeze between the humid air, see the golden glow through the glass of my window guiding me toward something stable, something certain. The warm summer nights delivering me strength of mind, body, and spirit. The voice inside tells me I am getting there. I am getting there. I have put this journey on hold for too long, dismissing it with distractions, working …

Of Hell & High-Rises

There are no words to explain that alone feeling I get when sitting outside on my steps looking unto the alleyways in the bleak-half darkness, the lights of the city combating that of the moon’s own glow. Stray cats run and meow, meow, in fights and dart across the landings, their shadows cast in a higher statue than they’d ever be in day. I watch the smoke rise high from my fingers, I breathe in and out the cold. An ambulance leeches by, and bums lurk seeking shelter under the rooftops that I silently watch them from, taking it all in. Rustic, pissed on grandeur. Cables cross like Hindu lines of ancient texts across the sky; old sneakers dangle from them like youthful suicide. A Ford Focus lurches in front, her headlights menacing, break my romanticized gaze, and here I am again, in nothing but my 21st century reality where everything is candy coated vomit, shined, plastered, and spun into something of ‘value.’ There is no lesson to be learned from this, there is no …